weapons of mass annoyance
4 March, 2009, 9:55 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

In the war on hooligans punks and no-good-nicks proprietors are breaking the sound barrier. While the stylings of Mylie Cyrus could drive me out of a Forever 21 on principle, other retailers are not being so upfront about their selective audience deterrents. To keep away younger –unwanted– shoppers some malls are feeding hi frequency sounds through their audio (http://trainhorns.net/sound/). Like Riddex with cockroaches, essentially it is torturing anyone under 25 simply for being young and having good ears. Hooligan- bzzzzzzzzzz, child prodegy – bzzzzzzzzzzzz, Mylie Cyrus – bzzzzzzzzz. (actually that’s sweet revenge)

But here’s the thing, I’m over twenty-five, and I can still hear it. And it’s crazy annoying – bzzzzzzzzzzz. Have these stores just lost me as a customer too? What about parents with small children? Is it smart to pump hi frequency noise pollution into kids ears, not only for safety, but just because it will piss them off? A crying kid drives EVERYONE away.

That’s the problem with these sweeping solutions. There is no such thing as a smart bomb. You can’t control all the variables in a population and nothing is as targeted as you intend it. In an attempt to subliminally drive off once group of people, essentially by treating them like vermin, you end up with far more collateral irritation all around.


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